Fear unexplored...

"Fear unexplored is pain..."wendy rule

Here I sit, 28 years old going through a divorce with my partner of 11 years. We survived through many things. But the one thing we could not survive...I could not survive... was his substance abuse.

At one time the very thought of leaving was unbearable. The words "You have to move out" or "I'm leaving" sat in my throat for so long. The fear of saying this to him was tremendous because of the emotional pain I knew we would both go through. And to be honest, I was in more fear of his pain than my own. But now that I am on the other side of it I realize the fear was so much worse than the reality.

Our relationship was very forgiving and loving in many ways. But in so many other ways it was like watching paint peel from a wall. A slow, painful process, watching him waste away right before my eyes.

So, I bow out and say goodbye to my best friend and lover of 11 years. May you find peace, love, good health and most of all release from the chains of addiction that bind you everyday, holding you back from living your most true, highest, happiest self......

What do I do now? What is the first step on my road to healing???

A road trip!!! What else?!?

I am off to Asheville, NC to volunteer at Gladheart Farms. Ah, the beautiful mountains, the music, the art! I am leaving with pretty much nothing and am going to live the wanderlust lifestyle for awhile. SweeT!!!

I currently reside in Palm Bay, FL (for about 1 and a half more weeks!). I am gearing up for a yard sale to raise money for my train ticket and have been sending out emails to friends to donate a few things to help out. This is a great way to raise funds and help take a load off for folks with a little excess around the house or garage. We once raised about $300 in 2 days for our friends charity this way!

So, enjoy the journey along with me. Maybe you'll try this for yourself someday!

Peace and Love!